This is the time of year when that valuable commodity, fear, is tapped from every desperate merchandising angle. The commercials. The books. The stores. Take a look at the influx of spooky movies Hollywood throws at us just about now. I suppose if there were more viewers like me, the spooky movie industry would either go bankrupt or adjust its offerings.
What scares me? Not over-the-top Hollywood movies full of gore, and sudden bursts of loud music to call up a startle reaction. Not lions or tigers or bears. Not ghouls, monsters, vampires, werewolves or zombies. Not fire-breathing dragons or Rottweilers. Not even spiders.
Here’s what I’m afraid of:
- All matter or rodents including, but not limited to, mice, gerbils, rats, hamsters
- Chickens and geese
- Little striped garden snakes
- Optometrists and Ophthalmologists
- Walmart after Thanksgiving Day
- The old band, Flock of Seagulls
- Beets, canned, pickled, whole, diced and/or sliced